John Oliver Addresses JD Vance Sofa Rumor

Norman Ray

International Courant

John Oliver spent a number of minutes of his Final Week Tonight opening phase speaking concerning the 2024 presidential race, however he devoted an excellent chunk of that point addressing the baseless rumor that JD Vance as soon as had intercourse with a sofa.

As you’d anticipate, Oliver is not any fan of Republican candidate Donald Trump’s vice presidential operating mate.

“JD Vance sucks a lot that it says one thing that for a number of days this week, the web ran wild with a joke tweet that he was the primary VP choose to have admitted in a New York Instances bestseller to fucking an inside-out latex glove shoved between two sofa cushions, with a quotation to a web page quantity from his memoir,” Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Household and Tradition in Disaster, Oliver mentioned on his HBO present.

Whereas that’s not truly true, Oliver opined that he may imagine it may need occurred.

“It’s not in his guide, however I feel the rationale it spreads so quick is likely to be that A, no person learn that fucking guide, and B, it was extremely simple to imagine, as a result of when you ask me to attract a person that fucks his sofa, 10 instances out of 10, I am drawing this man,” he mentioned, displaying a photograph of Vance. “When you ask me to play Two Truths and a Lie with this man, earlier than he even opens his mouth, I shout, ‘The reality is he fucks his sofa!’ I’ve by no means seen somebody with extra couch-fucker power.”

Oliver continued: “He seems like he watched the Tom Cruise-Oprah interview and was jealous of Tom’s sneakers. When you advised me that his first celeb crush was the plastic couch from All people Loves Raymond, I might imagine you with out query. When you advised me the rationale you discover cash in between sofa cushions is as a result of JD Vance at all times leaves a tip, I might be like, yeah, yeah, that sounds proper.”

The Final Week Tonight host famous that the rumor even made its means all over the world, with a Norwegian media outlet posting the headline “Hadde ikke intercourse med couch,” which he quipped “feels like an indication they needed to put up in IKEA after JD visited an excessive amount of.”

Oliver additionally referenced the Related Press’ resolution to submit a fact-check with the headline “No, JD Vance didn’t have intercourse with a sofa,” which the information outlet later faraway from its web site. The hyperlink then took web surfers to a message studying “web page unavailable” and the reason that the story did not undergo the AP’s “customary enhancing course of.”

“No promote it did not as a result of there’s an apparent drawback with that authentic headline,” Oliver mentioned. ” And the rationale I do know that’s we care loads about info and exact phrasing on this present. So I can let you know, you may’t say JD Vance did not have intercourse with a sofa definitively. You possibly can say that he did not write about doing that in his guide as a result of that’s provable, however that is not the identical as asserting he by no means fucked a sofa, particularly as a result of he hasn’t formally denied it.”

Oliver then mentioned that his employees reached out to Vance’s marketing campaign final week, asking point-blank if Vance “ever had intercourse with a sofa.”

“They — and that is true — hung up on us, which is, and that is vital, not a ‘no,’ is it?” he mentioned.

Observe-up texts and emails have additionally been left unanswered.

“However … look, who is aware of the place that is going,” Oliver continued. “The information is transferring so quick proper now, the RNC was solely final week, it was solely two weeks in the past that Trump was shot and there are such a lot of variables between right here and November. We do not know who Harris’ VP choose can be. We do not know which candidate will keep momentum. The race is inconceivable to foretell. However … till he tells us in any other case, I am gonna assume that JD Vance fucked a sofa.”

John Oliver Addresses JD Vance Sofa Rumor

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