Global Courant 2023-05-07 16:40:08
Thank you, Gov. DeSantis, for targeting a real security problem in Florida.
I am, of course, talking about Disney World’s monorail system.
Since 1971, this most-used monorail system in the world has brought about 50 million people a year safely to destinations in the park. So it’s way too late for a mistake.
Therefore, we should applaud DeSantis for having the foresight to intervene. Because, as we know, there are three serious health and welfare issues plaguing the state, issues that require prompt government action.
They are:
Sending more untrained Floridians into public places with loaded guns.
Ban abortions for women before they realize they are pregnant.
Take control of the Walt Disney World monorail.
Account. Account. And check.
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Gov. Ron DeSantis is getting state lawmakers to introduce a bill to get the state of Florida to take over safety inspections for the Walt Disney World monorail, which has operated under its own safety inspectors for 52 years.
Vendetta or good public policy behind the monorail move?
Some people have mistakenly believed that the state government is taking control of the Disney monorail system solely because of a childish vendetta that an emotionally stunted adult has with the theme park company over a single, unrelated disagreement.
They somehow imagine DeSantis, looking for new ways to punish Disney for his criticism of its signature “Don’t Say Gay” law, using clumsy, transparent ways to hurt the company .
But for that to happen, DeSantis would have had to achieve the dysfunctional trifecta of being bigoted, childish, and silly all at once.
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, left, takes on the Walt Disney Co. in a battle for control of the company’s land management district.
And he should be willing to subject Florida taxpayers to massive attorneys’ bills to defend legally problematic attempts to muzzle free speech in what he likes to call “the free state of Florida.”
Government surveillance for unprecedented problem
That would be extraordinary. Especially for a governor. Why would a person with a seat at the adult table behave with such a junior-high level of maturity to harm the state’s largest tourist attraction?
Story continues
Can’t be. I refuse to believe that 4.6 million Floridians could have voted for such a damaged person last year. There must be an alternative explanation.
It must be that the Disney monorail needs some new government oversight, because it’s… uh, uh… secretly dangerous. Yes, that’s the ticket.
The monorail is a popular way for Walt Disney World guests to arrive at the Magic Kingdom, Epcot, and three resort hotels.
It’s the kind of dangerous that looks absolutely safe to the naked eye, but can be just as damaging as those unseen squads of drag queens performing in Florida’s public kindergartens.
It may be that we should thank heaven that we have a leader who sees both the real and the invisible problems.
State lawmakers followed DeSantis’s orders here by writing a bill that puts the Florida Department of Transportation in charge of Disney’s monorail.
Before that, Disney and other theme parks in the state with more than a thousand employees and their own full-time inspectors were responsible for conducting their own safety inspections.
It’s the “Don’t Say Disney” bill
The preliminary new legislation gives the state authority to oversee all “private fixed guideway transportation systems operating in this state that are located in an independent special district created by local law and having boundaries within two contiguous counties. “
That’s a 29-word description for Walt Disney World. (I guess you could say the bill is written in a “Don’t Say Disney” manner.)
It gives the state of Florida access to the park’s primary transportation system, the system that takes patrons to and from Magic Kingdom, Epcot and three Walt Disney World resorts. It is calling for state inspectors to conduct “structural safety inspections” on the elevated sections of the line.
Under the law, state inspectors have the right to shut down Disney monorail service while conducting safety inspections, “to ensure the safety and well-being of inspectors and the traveling public during such inspections.”
Palm Beach Post columnist Frank Cerabino
It does not specify how long the transport service would be disrupted. Or that this would lead to subsequent hull inspections in the dry dock of the Seven Seas Lagoon ferries, the boats that provide an alternative method for guests entering the Magic Kingdom.
But one thing is certain: the state of Florida has our safety concerns here as a top priority. Lawmakers may encourage more gun homicides and lead more Florida women to alley abortions, but no one will ever say that Florida is turning its back on the dangers of the Disney monorail.
Thank you, Governor DeSantis.
Frank Cerabino is a columnist for The Palm Beach Post, part of the USA TODAY Florida Network. You can reach him at fcerabino@gannett.com.
⇨Did Frank get your goat? Then read some of his earlier columns that we’re sure will excite you even more. Go here.
This article originally appeared on the Palm Beach Post: Gov. DeSantis escalates beef with Disney with monorail safety trick
